We're all human.

Everybody wants to be happy and we're all in this delusion that as long as we pretend to be happy, we will be happy. But nobody really understands the awkward part when your friends find out you're not that chirpy bird like how they usually see you in class. It's funny when you see someone, who seems to be really happy and funny in class, and off-school, things like "do I belong here?" actually passes through their minds. It's scary, because I know how it feels like to be neither here nor there. It screws up your entire equilibrium as you question your existence - a quasi depressing (near) emotion that many think they will grow out of it. However, true experience can tell you that not many grow out of such thoughts because your surroundings are a constant reminder on your own case of existentialism. It's okay boy, nobody really understands such stuff as well. So let's just kick back and relax these couple of years while you wait to let such a feeling fade, and throughout this phase of uncertainty, let your heart take charge.